sorry (with puppy eyes)

u must have been expecting this.sooner perhaps,but il offer the apology all the same. I AM SORRY! that is for the neglect i have imposed on you for the past week.now for the explanation..

it was not without reason,i assure you. it was neither writers block nor any nervous disorder.the truth of the matter is, tho u might have trouble believing it, is that i was busy.up to my elbows in icing and cake!my bath time,sleep time and meal time all suffered accordingly.i had 3 large orders for saturday and sunday.one of those was for a lady who visited me and phoned me a ridiculous number of times,much like a new boyfriend would pester his girl. a borderline stalker who changed her order more times than i would like to remember.ultimately she settled on a rather striking design but seemed none too pleased when she picked it up. sigh, guess thats what the fussy get. the other order was an alice in wonderland inspired 2 tier topsy turvy cake, which was incredibly fun to make.stripes,spirals and mushrooms in bubblegum colors.this bakers dream!

anyway, il be leaving again this time for two weeks.home bound, yay!  dont accuse me of neglect as im being courteous this time. before my memory fails me,thanks again to the mister for his endless patience ,creative advice and assistance. made the tasks much more enjoyable
.
 until you read again

ma assalam

when temper tantrums go too far

"Me and my husband are both 24 yrs old. We have Mashallah 3 beautiful boys together and we have been married now 4 yrs. But not all of those 4 yrs. have been wedded bliss and sweet harmony. i was young and living in California and ran away from home to marry my muslim husband, not knowing much about him.. when my parents found out, we got remarried again a month later. a year later we had our first son. now i have come to the end of this marital bond of ours. He has a very violent temper and becomes very very abusive. He has no control of his anger and he doesn't care who is hurting in the process. Twenty days had passed since our first son was born and he punched in the face n broke my nose. i called the police and had him arrested, worried and paranoid about him coming home and abusing me or our son again.
in the past 4 yrs, he has broken my nose, my hand [twice], punched me repeatedly in the head and face, and landed me in the ER 4 to 6 times a year. i have had enough, i don't want for my boys 2 grow up and abuse their wives, sisters, and daughters, and then eventually me.. do i have the right 2 get a divorce. b/c i have tried escaping, counseling, separation, and even having talked to his parents. and there is no solution besides divorce or early death. Possibly suicide. y are we the weaker sex? his parents tell me the reason he hits me, is cause he loves me... how do you abuse the one you love?? u never will hear that a woman is abusing her husband at least not physically. but  women every day, all around the world are being abused physically, sexually, emotionally, and psychologically.... when is it enough? wen does it stop? wen all the women are dead. and there is no more producing.. please give me some guidance on what to do next? how to get out still alive? and y is this happening still?? in our world."

i read the above this morning in shock and disgust.it should not have surprised me as this is a common scenario throughout the world but the extent of her injuries horrified me and it is an indictment on humanity at large.

any form of abuse is unacceptable and it makes me wonder how and why it happens. maybe when i was much younger i may have lashed out physically whilst in anger.but coming of an understanding age i rarely if ever get so incensed to react violently.i may think "im angry enough to hit someone" but it hasnt and i pray that it wont ever reach my hands.

The Prophet PBUH advised regarding anger saying'"The strong is not the one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong is the one who controls himself while in anger."

ultimately i guess its just that;a lack of self control coupled with the inability to see the havoc you are wreaking.and possibly the environment in which one is raised..we need to help where we can and make sure such evils are prevented.more often than not we are like  the spectators many centuries ago in the circus of rome . it is as if no one cares or we are too afraid to stand up.


until you read again
ma'assalam

choc chip conveyor belt

sitting down to write this i feel like  im being transported back to grade 5.but the fact that theres no teacher breathing down my neck yelling about due dates,it reminds me that this is a voluntary effort and a way to share the wonders of a biscuit factory with you.

contrary to my - sleep until i cant sleep anymore- habit, i awoke early yesterday morning overly eager for  the day ahead.'take your wife to work day' or so i said, when my friend joked that i dont give my poor husband a break from me.im giving you the benefit of the doubt by assuming that you have already figured out where he works.anyway come 9;00am the rainy weather did nothing to dampen my spirits which soared even higher the moment i stepped in.mmmmmm,that pretty much sums it up.the smell makes you want to lick the walls and jump into the oven,okay not really,but its pretty amazing.my tour started at my husbands office, then upstairs to view the mixers from where the dough is lead through chutes  down to the lower level,where it  is then  cut and baked. The process churning out more cookies per minute than i can eat or  count for that matter.The baked goods proceed on their journey along the conveyor belt,to be cooled, weighed ,packed and distributed. Im usually not fond of biscuits with a strawberry cream but the smell in that section was simply intoxicating!even the budget line shortbread had me close to drooling. I was told that the company began in a shed with just one oven so the experience made me hopeful that i would one day open a successful bakery inshaAllah or that you may even see my  cupcakes lining the shelves of supermarkets nationwide. hehe,a girl can dream..

from the HUGE rolling embossers to the 25kg blocks of margarine,the biscuit factory had me enthralled.make a point to visit one or some sort of food based factory, maybe just not a cat food one.


until you read again
ma'assalaam

brand me

baby shopping is awesome!maybe even more so than shopping  for myself.on saturday afternoon the mister and i spent the better part of an hour searching for a camp cot and i couldnt help but  feast my eyes on the darling itsy bitsy clothes on offer.whilst viewing the sale items, an absolutely adorable branded box set of sneakers and a t shirt caught my eye and would later form the basis of a rather interesting conversation.

my cousin is a few months more closer to delivery than i am and is a constant source of advice and information.whilst sharing our latest baby purchase stories i mentioned the box set to her to which she responded that she has no interest in brands.she further explained that she knows of too many kids with pride because of the brands they wear.i responded saying that i would buy brands for my little one at the right price and which i will pass on to my other kids or nieces and nephews,because the quality is often much better.. she then shocked me with the reply that she knows of 2 year olds who think they are better than their cousins due to the brand on their t-shirts.  here i think the blame cannot be put on a child who thinks that way.a 2 year old says and is what  he hears from those around him. if a parent places emphasis on a brand,so too will the child. every child must be made to understand that whatever he has is a blessing,something to be grateful for and not reason to become arrogant.they should be taught that they must wear clothes 4 a purpose, the clothes must not wear them!

this all reminded me of the following quote in which is a powerful lesson for us all..
Ali (RA) expressed beautifully, "Detachment [from the dunya/world] is not that you should own nothing, but that nothing should own you.”

 until you read again

  ma'assalaam

today im sharing a beautiful Hadith i read, as no words of mine will ever inspire nor be as powerful as these..


On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: Allah (mighty and sublime be He) will say on the Day of Resurrection:

-O son of Adam, I fell ill and you visited Me not. He will say: O Lord, and how should I visit You when You are the Lord of the worlds? He will say: Did you not know that My servant So-and-so had fallen ill and you visited him not? Did you not know that had you visited him you would have found Me with him? O son of Adam, I asked you for food and you fed Me not. He will say: O Lord, and how should I feed You when You are the Lord of the worlds? He will say: Did you not know that My servant So-and-so asked you for food and you fed him not? Did you not know that had you fed him you would surely have found that (the reward for doing so) with Me? O son of Adam, I asked you to give Me to drink and you gave Me not to drink. He will say: O Lord, how should I give You to drink when You are the Lord of the worlds? He will say: My servant So-and-so asked you to give him to drink and you gave him not to drink. Had you given him to drink you would have surely found that with Me. - Hadith Qudsi.

 please remember to send durood upon our Nabi SAW and remember me (and baby) in your duas and forgive me for any errors against you

until you read again

 ma'assalaam

marriage matters

here's a bit of light heartedness following my venting yesterday.more so to assure you i have not lost the plot.. well entirely ; - )

Marriage teaches you more about yourself and human behaviour than i EVER thought possible.the downside is that there are some things you would have preferred not knowing.like the way your temper can flare from 0 to 100 in under 9 seconds.i have much to learn but here are some of the observations I have made thus far:

1.a wife will point out every error no matter the size and will EMPHASIZE how it makes her feel.
2.she will analyze every sentence, word and comma and often draws the most illogical conclusions.
3.she will tell her husband how she feels,using  the most polite terminology but inflicting maximum damage.
4.a husband can control his temper at crucial moments but a wife will cry or scream her temper dry.
5.a husband deals with PMS adopting the policy politicians use when dealing with striking masses.
6.a wife can cry herself to sleep and still feel miserable the next day, husbands get over things merely by sleeping.
7.both will always want to be right,but when making up they will both admit to being wrong.
8.im not sure if this applies to all marriages but this wife knows she will always,always love him(with the will of Allah)..

until you read again

ma'assalaam

WARNING!THIS BLOG CONTAINS EXCESSIVE USE OF THE EXCLAMTION MARK

This morning saw me close to screaming, or pulling  my hair out or that of someone else! my frustration has been building up for a few days now so maybe this particular incident tugged at my eyelashes more than it should, but i was really unimpressed. i'll fill you in..

Incompetence is stamped on a number of establishments in our country.and a number of individuals too. i may even be counted amongst them ,but im probably a bit biased when it comes to myself,hehe.anyway i contacted a well known company on Monday evening and i had to hold for about twenty minutes to talk to a consultant for about three minutes!baffling!
Yesterday i phoned another company - a ridiculous 12 times-with no answer!! the line was not engaged nor did it seem that there were any technical problems! the '12 times' was partially my fault,as  my husband later pointed out that i should have given up after a few attempts. the problem is that i was desperate to acquire some information, that they could only provide. note to companies,(not that any read my blog) If your business is closed for the day, or your receptionist is out with the pox ,LET YOUR CUSTOMERS KNOW!!! I am personally tempted to take my patronage elsewhere.

And now for my final rant(inspired by this morning).often when we are asked for something,or to do something for another we behave as if we have to displace the earth, transport it to within a mile of the moon ,then make the earth and the moon revolve in tandem around Neptune!! we are all at some point guilty of this ,but really, how hard is it to fulfill the legit requests of others? the requests are most often from our families and friends, so shouldn't our love for them be enough to say i will do it with a smile? shouldn't it be that we ask, would you like a slice of cake with that coffee? Grrrr!!!


until you read again (hopefully with me in a sunnier mood)
ma'assalaam

uninspired inspiration

of late iv been feeling rather uninspired.which would explain why i have not been blogging all that much. i have tho, taken to reading advice and quotes in the hope that it would spark some life in my fingertips.no such luck yet so i will share one of the quotes that i particularly enjoyed and which relates to eveyone, assuming the  organ of yours(as mentioned in the poem) is functional..

"The heart is the place where we live our passions.It is frail and easily broken,but wonderfully resilient.There is no point in trying to deceive the heart.It depends upon our honesty for its survival"

until you read again